Oh, hello self-doubt you Mo Fo!
Stopping self-doubt is easier said than done. So is there anything we can do to help ourselves when this little a-hole comes in to your head and tries to play mind games with you?
Firstly, let’s get one thing straight … YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
We all battle with this, even the most successful of people have waves of self-doubt.
Lady Gaga revealed, “I still sometimes feel like a loser kid in high school”
It happens to the best of us.
As Models or Creatives, we are essentially exposing our work for the world to see, already we are our own worst critics but when you have to put yourself and your work out there, it’s really scary!
‘what if no one likes it?’
‘what if no one watches it?’
‘I’m no good at this’
‘I look like shit/my work looks like shit’
‘my voice sounds weird’
This is a just a snippet of some of the negative self-talk we give ourselves. It’s horrible!
And I will be totally honest with you, Self-doubt tries to F me up at least 3 times a week. A few years ago, I didn’t even know what was going on when this used to happen to me. I just used to feel really crap, think it’s too hard basket and then give up on what I wanted to do/say/create.
However, I came to realise that was a ridiculous way to deal with anything. I realised what this devil on my shoulder actually was. So, I researched intensely about why we get it and how to get rid of it!
I was feeling so confident I was like ‘up yours self-doubt’, but then whenever I went to do something that was the slightest bit out of my comfort zone, the devil on my shoulder came back.
But for the first time I recognised it for what it was. I now understand exactly what’s happening. I tell myself that I’m being silly, that I’m worthy and my work is worthy.
I feel the fear and do it anyway.
It’s still a work in progress and it’s taken me awhile to figure out how to get through the other side and get my procrastination faze down to around 15 mins rather than 6 hrs (or forever).
I honestly, don’t believe we can ever completely rid ourselves of our self-doubt but we are able to manage it when it comes in.
A couple of my preferred ways of handling this are:
- Take a break! When your locked in to a negative spiral it can escalate quickly, taking 5 – 10 mins to just think about something else can help you think a little clearer and can be what gets you away from the edge of the cliff so to speak.
- Breathe! Taking a few deep breathes can calm you down. When I’m in mad procrastinator mode I find my heart races a million miles an hour, so this really helps with that.
- Trust your gut! Remember self-doubt isn’t a gut feeling, it’s in your head. Once you’ve calmed your farm by doing the above, take a min to listen to your gut. Then just do it, what ever it is just get it done or let it go.
If you have any tips on how to through self-doubt, please comment below. It helps knowing you’re not alone.